Sunday, September 27, 2009

Co-dependency Revisited/Currents Can Pull You Down

My husband, also a teacher and also 49, is in the middle of a depression, touched off by recent medical issues but something that has been building for a couple of years. While he struggles to find peace and joy in his life again, I sometimes feel like I have walked out in a strong current in the ocean, with the undertow pulling me away from shore. Sometimes I just want to let it take me. I know I'm in danger of sounding really whiny, but it isn't easy being the caretaker, the one who organizes things, makes doctors appointments, checking to see that he is "alright" when of course he isn't really "alright." But then again, what IS normal? This reminds me of my childhood with a physcially disabled, and sometimes depressed, mother. I was so happy the day I moved out and into my own apartment, so that I only was responsible for myself, even though I love her dearly!

On a much happier note, my son, who is a high school junior, FINALLY got his schedule straight and he is in four "good" classes - one International Baccalaureate elective, two AP, and the last Spanish he needs. He dropped out of IB this year, due to heavy work load and dislike for the A/B schedule, but AP pickings are slim at his school. Tragic that most of the students DON'T want an education, and they make it insufferable for the ones who DO. I really think public middle and high school are "dinosaurs," soon to be extinct in the education field. Those who can afford it use private schooling, and more and more families are drawn to home schooling in the upper grades. The safety issues are just not worth it! I don't think this is the situation our founding fathers imagined for education in America.

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